Pants On the Ground

Luke (3 yrs old) seems to be going through a stripper phase.  I can turn my back for one minute only to find that he has completely disrobed in record time. I try to choose my battles wisely so I only make an issue of it if we have company coming over. However, there is just no preparing for a random knock at the door.
Case in point, Daniel, the handsome exterminator, came by a couple of days ago to call on me (or treat our house for bugs, whatever). Luke walked up and said, “Hi,” to which he responded, “Well, look who’s got pants on!”

The Handsome Exterminator

We have a very handsome exterminator.  I will call him, Daniel, because that’s his name.  Whenever he goes to your house, you’re the envy of the neighborhood.  I should mention that it is perfectly acceptable to sexually harass Daniel BEHIND his back.  I repeat, acceptable AND harmless, as long as he never knows.   

I had just lathered my hair when Brantley burst into the bathroom.
“The bug man’s here!”
“On a Saturday?  Dang it,” I told him. “I won’t be out in time. Did he ask about me?”
“Did he say, “Hey, how’s your wife?” No, he didn’t, but he IS looking good.  His beard has come in nice and full, too.”
“Tell him I said, hey.  Then, come back and tell me what he said.”
“No. I’m not doing that.”
“Ok, then throw something on the floor so he has to bend over and pick it up.  You can do it up to three times without it being suspicious.”
“I’m leaving now.  You’re freaking me out.”

By the time I was out of the shower, Daniel the bug man had come and gone.  He had, however, been there long enough to secure our house of pests with his big, strong arms.  I’m keeping my fingers crossed that we have another ant problem this summer.  As long as Brantley doesn’t catch me painting the house with honey, I’ll be just fine.