Dog CPR And Making A Fool Of Yourself: How To

While I was in Montevallo, AL over the weekend visiting with friends and signing copies of You Have Lipstick On Your Teeth, my husband stayed home for a work-related obligation.

(Pictures from the Montevallo, AL book signing here.)

He used this time away from me to go out and buy himself a fancy, new smart phone. This is a big deal because I have purposely spent years making sure he had a phone that could barely take a picture. Internet access?? Fuh-get about it. I NEEDED him to be dumber than me, technologically speaking, so I could retain the balance of power in our relationship. 

Well, it’s safe to say that the tides had shifted. 

As soon as Luke and I returned home, Brantley was there with his new phone. It had a giant screen and the amount of time he spent looking at it was really starting to bother me. 

“Must regain the upper hand,” I thought to myself. 

When the bottom fell out:

That night at dinner the conversation came upon what would happen if our Yorkie, Baxter went into distress and needed CPR. Brantley had the audacity to say that I wouldn’t know what to do. Puh-lease! I wasn’t about to take that lying down and immediately began a tutorial on canine mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.

One minute I was explaining how to hold Baxter’s little mouth closed with both my hands while simultaneously blowing into his nose, and the next minute Brantley was snapping a picture of my demonstration with his fancy, new smart phone. 

Not a good look for me…